okay curvezilla ive been wondering you know (of course you know) how marvel comes out with varient covers left and right and as a fan and collecter i feel i should get as many as i can even though i havnt bought a varient cover in a while im thinking i should buy the new moon knight one but its 50 bucks and im already collecting many a series to just throw out a 50

so please great curvezilla answer this question and ill never question you powers....... again… for now..........

You have asked the Great Curvzilla a question that I must take seriously.  See if you would have asked me about something trivial like global economic markets or the rising tide of anti-Americanism, I could have given you a trivial answer.  But you sir have gone and asked me about comic collecting and this is a very serious thing.  I am pretty fed up with the whole varient cover jazz, BUT you know that Moon Knight #1 is going to be hot for the next couple of months.  I say buy one and sell it or get store credit for it as soon as you realize a 25% appreciation.  Now that is playing it safe, you could wait until it goes up to a hundred and sell but it might not get that high.  Or you could get Finch to sign it which would really boost the value, he was at CAGE Con last year and hopefully he will be back.  Just don’t hold it for too long.  I have seen these things sky rocket and then fall back to earth harder than Ben Affleck’s career.

Dear Lufguy,

You see the problem is that there are two kind of Mexicans.  There are the Speedy Gonzales Mexican and the Slow Poke Rodriguez Mexican.  Speedy Gonzales Mexicans all come the the U.S. for better jobs and better lives.  Slow Poke Rodriguez Mexicans stay in Mexico and take siestas all day long.  When the Speedy Gonzales Mexicans go back to Mexico to visit they see the Slow Pokes taking siestas and not working and this makes them very angry.  So when when Speedy Gonzales Mexicans come back to the U.S. they talk about how lazy Mexicans are.  Now you may ask, “Aren’t they Mexicans too?”, and the answer is not anymore, they say they are American.  So that is why you have been told that Mexicans are lazy and Mexicans are taking all the jobs.  God Bless America and all those who WANT to BE American!  God bless the Mexicans, Irish, Italians, English, Chinese and a host of immigrants from all over the world who came to the greatest Nation in the world and wanted to be American and assimilated into the great MELTING POT!

if yesterday was two days ago tomorrow, will the day after tomorrow be today or yesterday?

Love,
Matt

Standard: Ideal 31-7-8

The answer is Blue.  Now one for you. 1 door closes, 9 open. When 9 close, 1 door opens. What is it?

Well that’s easy… its a baby. While in the womb, the only orifice that is open is the naval via the unbilical cord, however, after birth, the naval shuts… and the eyes (2), ears (2), mouth, nose (2), anus, and either penis or vagina holes open.

and one for you:

First think of the person who lives in disguise,
who deals in secrets and tells naught but lies.
Next, tell me what’s always the last thing to mend,
The middle of middle and end of the end?
And finally give me the sound often heard
During the search for a hard-to-find word.
Now string them together and answer me this,
Which creature would you be unwilling to kiss?

Love,
Matt

Standard: Ideal 31-7-8

also, riddle me this:

What can run but never walks,
has a mouth but never talks,
has a head but never weeps,
has a bed but never sleeps?

Love,
Matt

Standard: Ideal 31-7-8

Last one, maybe:

What crime is punishable if attempted, but goes unpunished if commited?

Love,
Matt

Standard: Ideal 31-7-8

Suicide

curvezilla - 18 April 2006 10:34 PM

Dear Lufguy,

You see the problem is that there are two kind of Mexicans.  There are the Speedy Gonzales Mexican and the Slow Poke Rodriguez Mexican. 

What a country! You can refer to the fastest growing minority community in America by cartoon stereotypes and no one rioted or got killed. Is something wrong with Americans? In some other countries, cartoon references start a bloodbath. Then you also boiled down to the core of the immigration matter the same way. So, my next question is, What will your answer be when the White House calls and wants you to bring you brain to Washington to resolve the rest of the burning issues of the day?

Sorry bro but it is what happens when all the girls on the second floor of the Kappa Kappa Gamma house find out you are dating them all and you have to go back to your GDI girlfriend.  I mean come on, I thought that was an easy one

Matt Fichtel - 18 April 2006 11:14 PM

Well that’s easy… its a baby. While in the womb, the only orifice that is open is the naval via the unbilical cord, however, after birth, the naval shuts… and the eyes (2), ears (2), mouth, nose (2), anus, and either penis or vagina holes open.


and one for you:

First think of the person who lives in disguise,
who deals in secrets and tells naught but lies.
Next, tell me what’s always the last thing to mend,
The middle of middle and end of the end?
And finally give me the sound often heard
During the search for a hard-to-find word.
Now string them together and answer me this,
Which creature would you be unwilling to kiss?

Lufguy,

When the White House calls I will answer with the wisdom and wit that has been bestowed on the Great Curvezilla.  I will go to Washington and start my quest for World Domination.  I will crush dissent and the blood of the non believers will flow in the streets!  Or something like that.

Lufguy - 19 April 2006 02:14 PM

curvezilla - 18 April 2006 10:34 PM

Dear Lufguy,

You see the problem is that there are two kind of Mexicans.  There are the Speedy Gonzales Mexican and the Slow Poke Rodriguez Mexican. 

What a country! You can refer to the fastest growing minority community in America by cartoon stereotypes and no one rioted or got killed. Is something wrong with Americans? In some other countries, cartoon references start a bloodbath. Then you also boiled down to the core of the immigration matter the same way. So, my next question is, What will your answer be when the White House calls and wants you to bring you brain to Washington to resolve the rest of the burning issues of the day?

Matt Fichtel - 18 April 2006 11:23 PM

Last one, maybe:

What crime is punishable if attempted, but goes unpunished if commited?

attempted murder.
If you actually murder someone your are tried for murder, not the attmepted murder.

advocatus diaboli
Vexilla regis prodeunt inferni

Matt Fichtel - 18 April 2006 11:20 PM

also, riddle me this:

What can run but never walks,
has a mouth but never talks,
has a head but never weeps,
has a bed but never sleeps?

A River.

OR Nora Jones doing a cover of a Billy Joel song.

advocatus diaboli
Vexilla regis prodeunt inferni

Matt Fichtel - 18 April 2006 11:14 PM

Well that’s easy… its a baby. While in the womb, the only orifice that is open is the naval via the unbilical cord, however, after birth, the naval shuts… and the eyes (2), ears (2), mouth, nose (2), anus, and either penis or vagina holes open.


and one for you:

First think of the person who lives in disguise,
who deals in secrets and tells naught but lies.
Next, tell me what’s always the last thing to mend,
The middle of middle and end of the end?
And finally give me the sound often heard
During the search for a hard-to-find word.
Now string them together and answer me this,
Which creature would you be unwilling to kiss?

A Spider

advocatus diaboli
Vexilla regis prodeunt inferni